


The Worst Type

by geekhombre



Category: Batman - All Media Types
Genre: Detectives
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-23
Updated: 2021-01-23
Packaged: 2021-03-14 21:08:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,410
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28927056
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/geekhombre/pseuds/geekhombre
Summary: A typical night and a typical case.
Comments: 8
Kudos: 7





	The Worst Type

A muted sigh. A ledge behind the corner. Across the street.

These are the worst kinds of cases. He did not find the victim first. He heard it on the scanner. Which meant the police arrived first. The door looked burst in, the scene was grisly enough to merit more police, which meant trampling the apartment, well-meaning CSI techs scooping up everything that caught their eye, and ... hmm. That is Montoya coming out of the bedroom. Good, she will talk, when he finds her later... hmmph. That large shadow can only mean - Bullock behind her. He's convinced that I mess up their cases and is paranoid about my involvement. But two senior detectives must mean that there is some aspect to the case he has not determined yet. 

Quick remote computer access turns up the reason. The name on the lease, Sam Smith, is not a real person. But a cover for a corporation, Lutwidge Ltd. But that seems to be a shell. Why cover like that when the source is so obvious?

Grunts and a scream.

He will return later once they're gone.

\------------------------------------

The mugger is secure for hours and the police notified. The near victim was grateful, and willing to talk to them. Always a bonus.

The apartment had limited security and was easy to enter without further disturbing evidence. First just standing in a corner. There will be no fine evidence, so he has to hope for something subtle. These are the worst kinds of cases. Maybe he should just skip straight to confronting the almost-certain perpetrator, but... it will be easier to interpret if I have a framework to determine what his ramblings mean. The apartment appears to be lived-in, but he doesn't accept it. Newspapers, but just the last two days. The kitchen is in perfect order. Alfred would be pleased, but unusual if this was really the apartment of a single man. IKEA plates and glassware. No personal mugs. No odd tools, just the most common kitchen utensils. All relatively new. A quick walk through the one bedroom and the bathroom confirmed this impression. It is a set scene. By whom? For whom? Was something removed? Something added? A long slow lingering look (and smell and listen) was required. These cases are the worst. 

He batted down his impatience and breathed deeply opening his attention for connections. The bookcase in the bedroom gave the first ping. An old copy of On the Origin of the Species on a shelf of bestsellers. Of course, the Darwin was the only one he had read. There was a torn piece of paper as a bookmark. Nothing significant on the page, he thought, save "the colouring of pidgeons." A reference to Oswald? As he closed the book he noticed a phrase scrawled on the bookmark. "Twixt ape and man." He filed it away with damn little else. These cases...

\------------------------------------

Back home, or under home, he perused the police filings on the murder. A typical Gotham thug, who had worked for a half dozen or so different bosses ranging from the Falcones to the Riddler. The Riddler... 

Lutwidge was Charles Dodgson's middle name. Indicating a strong possibility of Jervis Tetch's involvement as Dodgson is more commonly known as Lewis Carroll. In addition to the Alice books, Dodgson was a mathematician with a fondness for puzzles. Quickly researching, he found a story of Dodgson being asked for a riddle, and instead making a new kind of puzzle. A doublet. The idea was to get from one word to another with a chain of actual words, changing only one letter in between. From ape to man... apt... also an abbreviation for apartment, of course... not many choices from there. Apn, useless, aan, quick check of the dictionary, of course. Opt, oat gets you the a, then mat, man. APE, apt, opt, oat, mat, MAN. Is this a riddle left from Edward, or a challenge from Jervis to Nigma? These cases are the worst. Regardless, mat is a word here, and, cross at himself, he realizes he did not look under the mat by the door. Back to the apartment. This seems subtle for the Hatter, but could Nygma really expect Tetch to solve it?

\------------------------------------

The underside of the mat had a clue. He hesitated to think of these as clues, since they are intentionally left by people with obsessive or compulsive fixations. A real clue is the consequence of what happened. Not a game. Thanks to the police, there are no actual clues. I message Montoya - it would be good to see what she thought about the crime scene. The reports showed that she was first on the scene after the patrol officers found the body. 

Monum6nt. The 6th character was either an upside down e or a 6. 

Games. 

\------------------------------------

Montoya didn't have anything more than the reports he had already seen on the bat computer. Sam Smith had been identified as Bill Lombard. She had found out that he was most recently henching for Penguin. Maybe it was the damn pigeons. Mostly she was curious about why he was interested. She didn't seem to know about Tetch owning the apartment, or the puzzle. He told her that even a minion deserved justice. She just raised an eyebrow. Fine. There might also be connections to the Mad Hatter or the Riddler. Or the Mad Hatter and the Riddler. It’s hard to imagine them going to war, she said. Clearly referring to the whole Joker/Riddler affair. 

Bullock wants to see you, she added, moments after he disappeared.

These cases are the worst.

\------------------------------------

Back to the computer, searching for monument, 6, Carroll turned up a riddle. “A monument - men all agree - am I in all sincerity. Half cat, half hindrance made. If head and tail removed should be, then most of all you strengthen me; replace my head, then stand you see on which my tail is laid. What is it?” Cats now. Tablet. Nygma doesn’t use other people’s riddles. Not riddles you can Google or Lexivore. But why would Tetch be leaving riddles?

Focus. Unused clues opt, oat, Tablet. Origin of the Species. What does it have to do with Riddler, Hatter? A cat reference, a double reference, a bird reference… so muddled. A Carroll tablet did remind him of something.Some kind of code…

These cases are the worst.

\------------------------------------

“Well, where is he?!”  
“Yes, he is late, very late, for-”  
“Don’t say it. I was worried it was too obvious. Dodgson riddles, the code tablet, even the Darwin hint.”  
“I told you to ask about the raven and the writing desk.”  
“That’s not a riddle! Carroll said so himself.”  
“If he doesn’t come, what was the point of the whole thing?”  
“When has he not shown up? He will be here.”  
“Twinkle, twinkle-”  
“Stop that!”  
“...like a tea tray-”  
“JERVIS.”

\------------------------------------

Knowing the code, now, looking back at the police photographs, it was clear enough. And the man’s name, undoubtedly why he was selected. “Vault” was spelled out quite clearly in the square, braille like script. The Lombard Vault would have to mean the rare book collection at the Gotham University Library. So if it’s not between them, it is both of them. Which means it’s a trap. Sigh.

But then he couldn’t keep from smiling.

Even the worst kind of cases might have a silver lining.

\------------------------------------

He cut the lights. Their trap was relatively clever, for this sort of thing. The Vault only has one entrance, the atmosphere is strictly controlled. 

“He’s here!”  
“But where?”

The question was how they were going to lure him into the Vault. Danger to the collection? Hostage? An inspection revealed the clever twist. They weren’t trying to get him into the vault, they were going to use the vault for protection. 

“Edward!” he said.  
“I can’t tell where he is!”  
“Riddle me-”  
“No, Edward. Look at my face and I’m somebody. See my back-”  
“Riddler, he’s in the vault! That ruins -”  
“Quiet.” Sure enough, they saw his back, black cape barely distinguishable from the darkness. “We just reverse it.” And with that they slammed the vault door shut.  
“Wasn’t that your escape route?” he asked.  
“How…”  
“You didn’t let me finish,” he said. “See my back and I’m nobody. What am I?”  
Riddler just growled.  
“Oh, a looking glass!” and the Mad Hatter actually clapped.

He cuffed them together and called Montoya. Not a bad night for being one of these sorts of cases.


End file.
